Toon Tunes: Being the Worst With Captain Pollution

curated by Dusty Henry

For every good intention, there’s an equal and opposite bad intention. Captain Planet sought to teach kids about the wrongs of polluting our earth. Time has proved our green mulleted friend correct. However, even more prophetic was Cap’s most formidable foe: Captain Pollution.

While Captain Planet was made by the combined pours of earth, fire, wind, water, heart and heart; Captain Pollution was birthed from the combination of super radiation, deforestation, smog, toxics, and hate — basically alternate titles for future Muse records. He’s one nasty villain with his orange mullet and his honey mustard skin. Throughout the series, he’s the one foe to really take Planet down. But more than that, he’s become a reality in our day-to-day life. Whether he inspired it or not, there are bits of him everywhere we go.

He’s that obnoxious dude standing in front of you at a Sigur Ros show, talking loudly with his friends about leaving before the encore so they can hit up the vape store before it closes. He’s the man in his bathrobe at 2 p.m. chewing out the pizza guy for forgetting to bring his ranch dip. He’s clickbait personified. Cappy Pollutz is the worst of us, but damnit if we can’t help but marvel at his planet-may-care attitude. Here’s to you, Captain Pollution, and all the rancid caricatures that carry on your grimy spirit.

Captain Pollution’s Putrid Playlist